IR Hypotheticals: If Biggie Smalls Were to Grade Qaddafi Using the 10 Crack Commandments

I started the post below about 5 years ago but never finished it.  Within the world of International Relations there's always a good amount of discussion on counter-factuals and hypotheticals which can be downright gloomy.  If I have the good fortune to get my doctorate one day, I think this type of comparison below would liven up the classroom atmosphere.

Now I think my motivation level with regard to Q has passed the time has passed with regards to Qaddafi so I offer my incomplete post below just to, you know, get my brilliant ideas out there in the universe (warning some foul language below because, you know, this is a rap song by a drug dealer).

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In honor of Biggie Smalls day, I have decided to grade Qaddafi by the most gangster of grading mechanisms: Notorious' 10 Crack Commandments (video link is at the end of this post).   An interesting fact is that prior to his timely demise, he was a prolific hotelier in Africa.  If you stayed at a hotel on the continent it was likely one that he built and owned.  


1. Never let no one know, how much, dough you hold.  Q has definitely done a bang up job here.  All anyone can do is guess.  CBS News reports on it here.


2. Never let 'em know your next move. Q has been surprising the world for 40 years now.  He's a stalwart disciple in this respect.  Especially when it comes to wardrobe choices:


3. Never trust no-bo-dy.  Woops.


 4. Never get high, on your own supply.  I don't think anyone who has watched his speeches has any doubt about this one.  


5. Never sell no crack where you rest at.  


6. That god damn credit, dead it.


7. Keep your family and business completely separated.  Q fails big time here.  Nepotism is the rule not the exception.  


8. Never keep no weight on you.  Q fails.  Fails. Fails. Fails.

9. If you ain't gettin bags stay the fuck from police.  For the uninitiated, this means don't snitch. 


10. A strong word called consignment.  

You can listen to the 10 Crack Commandments here.

More fun stuff:
The Madmen of Africa

Blog of the Week! Mo'dernity Mo'problems

As readers of this blog will note, I am a big fan of Biggie Smalls aka Notorious BIG.  So any Africa blog that references the King of Hip Hop (in it's title no less!) is alright with me!  If you aren't familiar with the track, check it out here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=twkh0YiInPM

And it turns out the Mo'dernity Mo'problems is a great blog on top of it all.   It's well worth a read for its content and wit, as well as its blogroll.  You can also follow the author on twitter: @grantmgordon.

http://moproblems.wordpress.com/
"I am a humanitarian policy specialist who wears an evaluation and monitoring cape while roaming around field sites in conflict and post-conflict zones.  I’ve worked in Rwanda, Burundi, the Eastern DRC, and Liberia, land of never-ending bushmeat and baking soda. I speak French and Swahili and can whip out a survey from my belt much like a gun. This is a blog about culture, conflict, and causality in Central Africa and beyond."

Secretary Clinton "Speaks out" on Mass Rapes in the DRC...

One thing that struck me today was how long it took to get the word out to the public and for the mainstream media to pick up this story.  The horrific rapes occurred between 30 July and 3 August. 


http://www.cnn.com/2010/WORLD/africa/08/25/congo.rapes.un/index.html?hpt=Sbin

Let's examine the timeline:

-IMC (International Medical Corps) stated they reported rapes to UN's Office of Humanitarian Affairs on 6 August (3 days after). 
-MONUSCO (UN forces there) state they found 12 August (9 day after).
-U.N. Secretary-General Ban Ki-moon condemned the attacks Tuesday saying he was "outraged." (22 days after)
-I found out and commented 20 days after.  State commented 22 days later. 
-Investigations are 'ongoing.'

       One item that has been continuously harped in various news articles is the fact that these atrocities occurred less than 20 miles from a UN outpost/headquarters (supposedly in Kibua, which is along the 529R Road from Walikale and Goma in the east).  I haven't been able to confirm this though (the main UN headquarters are clear across the country in Kinshasa and it's unclear where these 'headquarters within 20 miles' is physically located).

However, reviewing the attached maps boost one's situational awareness considerably.  20 miles in the Sud-Kivu (South Kivu) province may as well be 1000 miles in this densely forested area. 

The orange tack represents the town of Walikale (a mining town).  The 529R Road runs east from there to Goma.  The rapes have been reported to occur along this road. 

Here's a satellite shot of that road.  Looks like it would be pretty easy to hide away in...

 Some sources in the MONUSCO have stated that they came into the villages but that the rebels fled back into the woods (LFDR and Mai Mai.  However, the UN's official position now states they didn't know they were occurring till 12 August. 

   Also telling is the confusion in the basics of geography and succint language.  Among the incongruities:
-Some reports describe the atrocities as occuring in the eastern congo (vice Eastern DRC, which is the correct location).
-Others describe them as occurring in the town of Luvungi (google map this 'town', you won't find anything in the DRC despite one article describing as a small town with a population on 2,200, although I believe it is there, just not in the online databases I have searched).  
-Some call the province in which the rapes occurred as the North Kivu, others as the South Kivu.

 On the map to the left it clearly shows Goma in the Nord-Kivu (North Kivu) and the rapes happened due West (and a little North) from there, thus they DEFINTELY did not occur in Sud-Kivu.













-Some don't mention Luvungi at all and say the rapes occurred throughout 13 villages along a 20 km stretch in North Kivu (Banamukira territory).  FUUO's position is that this all occurred in North Kivu for the record and most likely within 10 miles of the village of Walikale (the orange tack a few maps above). 

STATE DEPARTMENT PRESS RELEASE (my comments in italics)

Allegation of Mass Rape in the Democratic Republic of the Congo
Washington, DC

August 25, 2010

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The United States is deeply concerned by reports of the mass rape of women and children in the Democratic Republic of the Congo by the Democratic Forces for the Liberation of Rwanda (FDLR) – an armed, illegal rebel group that has terrorized eastern Congo for over a decade – and elements of the Mai Mai, community-based militia groups in eastern Congo.
Both groups deny the attacks but little is also known about these groups intel-wise...other than that they are bad news...I know of only one interview ever done with FDLR's leader. I was mistakenly referring to Joseph Kony, the leader of the LRA, who is also Bad news with a capital 'B'.
This horrific attack is yet another example of how sexual violence undermines efforts to achieve and maintain stability in areas torn by conflict but striving for peace.


The United States has repeatedly condemned the epidemic of sexual violence in conflict zones around the world, and we will continue to speak out on this issue for those who cannot speak for themselves. Less than a year ago, I presided over the UN Security Council session where Resolution 1888 (2009) was unanimously adopted, underscoring the importance of preventing and responding to sexual violence as a tactic of war against civilians. Now  the international community must build on this action with specific steps to protect local populations against sexual and gender-based violence and bring to justice those who commit such atrocities.


Sexual violence harms more than its immediate victims. It denies and destroys our common dignity, it shreds the fabric that weaves us together as humans, it endangers families and communities, it erodes social and political stability, and it undermines economic progress. These travesties, committed with impunity against innocent civilians who play no role in armed conflict, hold us all back.


When I visited the DRC last year, I learned an old proverb -- “No matter how long the night, the day is sure to come.” In the depths of this dark night of suffering and pain, my thoughts and prayers are with the victims and their families. The United States will do everything we can to work with the UN and the DRC government to hold the perpetrators of these acts accountable, and to create a safe environment for women, girls, and all civilians living in the eastern Congo. 

There is no doubt that Secretary Clinton's statement is heartfelt and while a large portion of it strikes FUUO as rhetoric, that is only because she (State) are keenly aware of the monumental undertaking that must be done and achieved to create this 'safe environment
It is FUUO's belief that creating this safe environment means infrastructure.  And the ability to maintain that infrastructure.  We are talking about roads, mass transportation, effective and reliable communication, to name only a small portion of requirements)  This is not something that the United States is currently structured or positioned to do (or the UN for that matter...but I won't get started on that rant). 


But there is a way...but this will require a 'radical' departure in how the "Trinity" (DOD, State, AID) do business...

Diplomat's Daily Quotable- from an Indian Notorious B.I.G.

The first quote reminds me of something Notorious B.I.G. would have said...had he been Indian and alive thousands of years ago.
Reprisal: "If the enemy fights deceitfully he should be paid in his own coin."
-The Mahabharta

The Mahabharata (Sanskrit Mahābhārata  is one of the two major Sanskrit epics of ancient India, part of the Hindu history.  It has about one hundred thousand verses, about 1.8 million words total, and is roughly ten times the length of the Iliad and Odyssey combined.
     The story itself is about the dynastic struggle for the throne of Hastinapura, the kingdom ruled by the Kuru clan. The two branches of the family that participate in the struggle are the Kaurava and the Pandava.  Both branches claim to be first in line to inherit the throne.  And so the struggle begins...sounds like it would make a great movie.

Retreat: "Some battles are won only after retreat to a more advantageous ground."

True on so many levels...also, some battles aren't worth winning in my opinion...